Dangerous Small Talk

 *

Good manners is the art of making those people easy 

with whom we converse.

Whoever makes the fewest people uneasy is the best bred in the room.

Jonathan Swift

Bless. My. Heart.

So I went back to campus because my French professor said he would raise one of our quizzes up a letter grade if we went and ate crepes with the French club.

Merci Monsieur.

So I met up with a girl in my French class and we were talking about school. She asked what classes I was taking. (the classic “we have nothing to talk about so I’ll ask you what classes you’re taking” technique. Very useful on first dates. Anyways…)

I told her I didn't really like my Economics class or the professor because he didn't control the class and he wandered when he lectured and I wasn't learning much. And since we didn't have much to talk about I kept talking about how much I hated this Econ class. At least a good 5 minutes of venting. After I had exhausted the topic I asked her how she decided to come to our college.

"Oh, my dad actually teaches here. Peter Ray? He teaches Economics."

I froze. I felt my face go Swedish fish red and my jaw started to do some ugly twitch movement.

She said "Is he your professor?" And I, being the brilliant person I am, decided that instead of taking it like a Spinster and just apologizing I decide to try and cover it up even more.

"Oh no, no, no, I'm in a DIFFERENT Economics class.”

 "Who is your teacher then?"

"Um.... Backster?"

Wow. Really? Backster? I had literally looked out the window and said the name of the first building I saw. Like she doesn’t know the names of the buildings on campus… Like Backster is a super common name and there’s no way she’s gonna figure out that I have lied…AGAIN. I mean, while I was at it, why didn’t I change his name to “the library!” or “the cafeteria!”. Backster…sheesh.

Then she asked me what classes I had tomorrow. "Econ and Ethics." I couldn't lie. I had already told her my full schedule and she knew I had math and french today so I couldn't frost one more lie onto my social faux pas crepe.

If there is one French term I have mastered it is that.

Faux pas.

So we chatted a little more then it was time for Charlotte to go home and hide under a pile of Econ papers. Oh speaking of which...I hope I get my Econ test back tomorrow. The one Peter Ray will be grading when his daughter comes home tonight....

Yeah. That will be awesome to see that letter grade.

Never thinking before speaking,

Charlotte