Second Date Breakdown

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While prepping my house for a baby shower for one of my girlfriends…

(For whom I also helped throw a bridal shower. Time flies when you’re….single)

p.s. I thought only ladies on Pinterest looked that cute pregnant. She was such a styl’in mama! Sheesh! I’m on her team.

Anyways….

While prepping I got a text from a fellow Spinster:

Went on a date last night.

He didn’t open my door once.

He asked me if I was hungry.

I said yes.

He didn’t buy me dinner.

#whydidyouaskbro?

He asked me if I wanted ice cream.

I said yes.

He only bought one so we shared.

#homeboybegettinnoseconddate.

This made me ponder the tactics needed for a second date. Gert and I have been contemplating this sticky situation. How do you show him you want (or don’t want) another? For guys it’s simple.

How to get a second date for Guys:

They need to copy this text message and paste it to their mirror and say, “I will not make these sad mistakes. I will buy dinner. I will open doors. I will throw my wallet open to buy delicacies for my date.” That will for sure at least keep us Spinsters intrigued.

How to get a second date for Girls: (warning: not as simple as the guys)

1.     Smile lots on the date.

2.     Laugh at his jokes.

3.     Do the elbow touch. If you are unfamiliar with the elbow touch see our earlier post. Don’t go touching people’s elbows willy-nilly. You will get arrested.

4.     On the doorstep pull the classic lines, “We should do this again”, “Call me next time you go_____. I’d love to come!”

5.     Close the door.

6.     Read (or send) your post-date thank you text.

7.     Wait contently for a few days.

8.     LOSE YOUR MIND WITH ANXIETY.

Oh my gosh. What do you do now? Do you wait for him to call for the second date? Do you ask him to hang out? Do you plan the second date? Should you tag him in a picture? Should you like his instagram? No, I’ll just wait. Wait! Why did that girl post on this wall!? Did he take her out too? Oh my gosh. He hasn’t called in days. What am I supposed to do? Was that my phone? Oh. No it was just the oven. Okay, so if he hasn’t texted me by 7 I’m going to text him. Ugh. I hate him. Why hasn’t he called me yet? I am never going out with him again. He is being a punk. Why did he act all flirty if he wasn’t even going to take me out again?! Oh. Phew. He texted me.

 I love him.

Dear Second Date. Stop playing so hard to get.

Charlotte 

5 Love Languages

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Ever heard of the 5 Love Languages? 

 It’s the idea that you have a way you like to receive/give love. Everyone has their own.

Acts of Service

Receiving Gifts

Words of Affirmation

Quality Time

Physical Touch

I am definitely a Words of Affirmation girl.

Defintion: Words of Affirmation: verb. To speak lovely things to another.

I was dating someone at the time who I thought I’d try it out on! (such a good idea, right?)

Char: “So I’ve been thinking, I would really like it if you would write me little notes or something sometime. I just really like that kind of stuff.”

Ex: “I don’t feel like I need to do that.”

Char: “No see, that’s the point. I read this book where it said I needed to tell you the way I feel loved. And I feel loved when you shoot me a text to say you’re thinking about me or that you think I look nice today.”

Ex: “Yeah I don’t do that.”

Char: “Yeah could you start? And I could start showing you that I care about you in the ways you like. What do I do that makes you feel loved? Do you like when I bake you cookies or go running with you or tickle your back?”

Ex: “I don’t feel like that’s an area that I need to improve in. I don’t need to start writing you notes.”

Char: Okay…he’s graduated from college. I think he should be able to get his.

“Alright so what I’m trying to say is I need you to express your appreciation for me a little more and I can do the same for you.”

Ex: “Yeah I don’t feel I need to do that.”

Is it just me or is there a br-br-broken record in here?

Apparently we were speaking different languages.

 Charlotte